“Meanwhile, back at the ranch…”

A recent Saturday evening found us out for dinner with a group of about twenty friends from church. It was a pleasant evening to sit in the courtyard of New Orleans’ Parkway Tavern enjoying the po boys, the conversation and fellowship. I was sitting next to Pastor Eric, and he and I were talking to some of the college kids from our youth group, who were sitting across the table.

A couple of them suddenly jerked their heads up, looking surprised, and Eric and I both turned around to see what was behind us.

There is small, roofed overhang on one side that shields the courtyard staff work area. On top of the roof was a black cat that apparently frequents the restaurant. He was nonchalantly sitting there, flicking his tail and licking his chops, apparently awaiting some sort of table scrap pouncing opportunity from our group.

I matter-of-factly went all Groucho Marx on the gang, stating definitively, “You know, a black cat crossing your path is a sure sign the animal is headed someplace.”

There was a pause, as the college kids digested the logic before nodding silent approval.

Pastor, Eric, who at ten years my junior and over a year as my pastor, is just starting to really get used to such stray utterances, turned and looked at me and said, “So is that what you do – just sit there passing out sage advice?”

“Guess so” I nodded, “About twenty years earlier than I had planned on, but yeah, it is what I do these days, pass out sage advice.” I paused. “Though sometimes it’s more…you know, tarragon advice; a bit more subtle with some complexity.”

Eric just looked at me, shook his head, went back to his po boy, sort of smiling.

I think I get prayed for more than some of the others.

The other day a purple pen I had in my pants pocket began leaking, soaking through the cotton lining of the pocket, and leaving me with two big, round purple splotches on my upper right leg.

It looked, in the mirror, like those U.S.D.A. stamps they put on sides of beef, so the natural inclination while getting ready for bed that night was to show my wife, then ask, seductively, “So, honey, what am I? Select? Choice? Prrrrime?”

“Ummm, suurrrrrre” she said, nodding in puzzlement, “One of those.”

On the plus side, she could’ve just said, “Alpo factory.” Theres an app stamp for that.

Mooooooooving on to….

October’s Household Quote of the Month:

“I’m thinking ahead here. My paranoia is getting the best of me.” – Will Lucker, 15 going on 37

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                As happens so frequently, while looking for something complete unrelated on the Internet, I stumbled across this, and now have the perfect wedding gift idea for most any couple: Twister sheets.I also have some twenty-fifth anniversaries to be noted over the next few years, so what I’m looking for now is a set of sheets based on the game Operation.

For gift giving in between those two chronological points, perhaps some matching his-and-hers Ouija board boxers.

Or maybe just send a card.

Until the next time, then.  Have a happy.


2 thoughts on ““Meanwhile, back at the ranch…”

  1. slpmartin October 15, 2011 / 11:10 am

    I rather liked you comment about the cat…of course I’ve often beem accusedof having the same illness. 😉


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s